"This is done"
by
Danny
Ingram
President of American
Veterans For Equal Rights |
|
"This is done". With those words President Barack
H. Obama sat down the last pen that he used to sign
into law the "Don't Ask, Don't Tell Repeal Act of
2010" on Wednesday, December 22, 2010, at 9:36 AM.
Actually watching in person as the Commander In
Chief of the United States Armed Forces rolled his
pen across the paper did little to reassure me that
the law that we had been fighting for almost 20
years had finally been overturned. I was still as
numb and unbelieving as anyone else. It had
happened so quickly. We had fought and struggled
for so long, it just didn't seem real that we had
finally won. Surely, the powers that stood against
us were just playing another game. Somehow, someone
was going to come running in at the last minute
shouting that the decision had been reversed. A
mistake had been made. A technicality had been
overlooked. The process would have to be repeated.
But that did not happen. "This is done." We have
won.
The inspirational words that our President used to
conclude his speech were nothing new. "Out of many
we are one." "We are a nation that believes that
all men and women are created equal". Well, of
course we do. We all know that. We've known it for
years. We've recited it every time we said the
Pledge of Allegiance. But there is now one vast
difference. There is one dawning, newly awakening
realization. Those are no longer just words for
someone else. For the first time those words apply
to me, to "us". For the first time in my life, I am
one of the "many". I am one of the "all". We may
not have known it, but that's what we have been
fighting for these many years, not just to be
allowed to serve in the military, but to be among
the "all", to claim our part of the American
promise. To be acknowledged, affirmed, so that when
we say "with Liberty and Justice for all", we are
among the "all".
We have been legitimized. "Civil rights" are our
rights, too. The "congratulations" that I continue to
hear from people are not just about winning one fight,
they are an expression of welcome to the "all". That is
what I feel today. I feel it when I talk openly about
who I am to people all around me as if, for the first
time in my life, I, too, am a valued American like all
other Americans. If the President said it, then it must
be true. I feel it in the air we breathe. For the
first time in my life something has changed in a
dramatic way. People who oppose us are no longer
justified in doing so. Now they are “un”-patriotic.
They are bad. With the rolling of the pen across the
paper, I am not just welcome to serve in the military.
With the rolling of the pen, a profound change has taken
place in my life, and in my country. There is still
very, very much work to be done. Our nation will not
live up to its promise of liberty until every single
citizen shares the same rights and responsibilities as
every other citizen. And that is yet a long time away.
But today, with the rolling of the pen, I feel something
for the first time since I understood what it means.
Today, for the first time, I AM FREE.
I was among the
first to be discharged under DADT in 1994. In the
closing weeks of December 2010, as the Senate voted for
repeal and I was among those present when the President
signed the bill, incredibly, everything came full circle
for me.
A few weeks ago I was asked to play taps for a military
funeral. One of our members had lost his son to
suicide. It was a heartbreaking tragedy. The son had
served in the Navy, so he, too, was a veteran. I told
my friend that I would be honored to play taps for his
son. He told me that his ex-wife had invited some other
veterans to attend the service, so I would not be the
only one in uniform.
We gathered at the church for the funeral, which would
be followed by the internment at a veterans’ cemetery
north of Atlanta. After the service began I saw the
other two men in uniform, and I was taken aback. I
recognized the man in the Army uniform. He was the man
who had discharged me from the Army almost 18 years
ago. A brief reception followed the funeral service, so
I had an opportunity to talk to retired Colonel Kelly R.
Jimenez before we left for the cemetery. He had been a
Major at the time. He recognized me as one of his
former soldiers, but evidently did not remember the
circumstances, since he asked me if I was “still in”. I
told him that I was not, and I asked if I might have a
one of his cards so that I could contact him later.
We drove to the cemetery, which was located in the
foothills of the Smoky Mountains. The cemetery was
breathtaking, located on a beautiful hilltop, and it was
a clear, sunny day. We were guided to the internment
site. I stood apart from the other mourners in order to
play taps. When Colonel Jimenez arrived, he stood next
to me, and when the order was given he saluted as I
played taps. There we were, two soldiers, in uniform,
serving together again. It was an incredible moment of
closure for me. I felt we had come full circle. He
whispered to me afterwards “good job”.
The next day I sent an email to the Colonel to remind
him of the circumstances for which he probably
remembered me. I didn’t know if he would respond. It
was several days, in fact, before he did respond. I
didn’t receive the letter until after I had returned
from the signing ceremony in Washington DC. What
follows is his letter to me. With the great honor of
watching President Obama sign the Repeal into law, with
shaking his hand and speaking to him, nothing has
touched my heart as deeply or meant more to me than this
letter. I know you will understand why it moved me so
very much when you read it. Nothing could ever mean
more:
The Colonel’s Letter
Dear SGT
Ingram or better yet, Dear Danny,
I waited a little bit before responding to this
inspiring E-mail message in the hopes to be able to say
"CONGRATULATIONS" for a well deserved victory. You were
bound and determined to reach this day and here it is.
Moreover, you never lost sight of your objective(s) and
even though you lost some significant battles, you won
the war. I'm very proud of you and your achievements.
Danny, I want you to know that I never forgot you, nor
the reason as to why you were separated/discharged from
the USA. Please know that a Commander that cares for his
soldiers never forgets his best enlisted member. I'm not
telling you this to make you or me feel better, I'm just
stating the fact; that is, you were our best 1015th
Heavy Maintenance (DS) Company Enlisted Soldier.
It's not easy to be a Commander as you probably know
because of your current leadership position; as a matter
of fact it's a lonely position saturated of big
responsibilities and at the end of the day you are the
one that has to make the final decision and then live
with the consequences of such decision. My decision
concerning your discharge at that time was first to
treat you with the respect and dignity that my best
soldier deserved and then process your chapter for the
right reasons and not for the wrong perceptions of
narrow minded individuals that wanted to make an example
of you. You need to know that... yes, it was very
difficult to process your paperwork because there were
some senior grade officers that wanted to make an
example of you, but I refused to follow their advice and
my chain of command (particularly COL Helmly at that
time and nowadays former MG Helmly) backed me up and I
was able to follow the regulation without placing any
bias into the process. Another confession that I have to
make to you is that I certainly forgot the story that I
told you, but certainly sounds like something I would
say to someone that I truly appreciate and respect for
his moral convictions. Although it's 17 years after the
fact I hereby fully authorize you my dear friend to
utilize in all confidence my name whenever you feel that
the telling of the story is fitting to the message you
are trying to convey for your audience better
perception.
I share your thoughts about that DADT is really and
truly unconstitutional, and that no soldier should ever
die on the battlefield because the medic who could have
saved his life was kicked out of the military for
"loving the wrong person"... I differ on this one simply
because there is no such thing as loving the wrong
person. When we love someone there is no conditions to
that love we freely and willingly offer, just like there
is no wrong God as long it's a God of love and
compassion.
As to our encounter, where we met once again wearing our
military uniforms next to each other, I considered that
not a coincidence but a divine act and a true honor.
Only the Good Lord could have brought us together in
such a tragic moment, but at the same time so
significant and inspiring.
Danny, I also thank you for being a soldier among
soldiers, one that through the times never surrender his
ideals and finally achieved "mission accomplishment" in
spite of the great frustrations and possible
humiliations inflicted by those narrow minded
individuals that allege with one side of their mouth in
serving our country, but in reality they are simply
serving their own very agenda(s). You have done it with
true love for this country and for this reason today you
can see the fruits of your hard labor. May God also
bless you until the last of your days!
Stay in touch and maybe how about lunch sometime by the
end of January of the new year? Let me know.
Respectfully,
COL(R) Kelly R. Jiménez |
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