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Conversations with
veterans
by Denny Meyer
I've spoken with quite a few LGBT
veterans over the years, from admirals and generals to a
most ordinary WWII private first class. The medals
and ribbons they bear on their chests could fill a
museum and should. From Valley Forge forward LGBT
heroes and heroines have sacrificed their personal
freedom for patriotic service. It was Gay Pioneer
Dr. Franklin Kameny who, describing his combat service,
as a private,
against the Nazi war machine in Europe in WWII, told me,
"I was just an ordinary soldier." Imagine!
Every word that passes his lips is pure history; and I
have felt privileged to be able to sit and converse with
him, and so many others.
We live in incredible times at
the dawn of the 21st century. In
preceding decades, I spoke with Vietnam veteran Leonard Matlovich and Korean War veteran Harvey Milk, gods of the gay revolution who had walked
the earth like ordinary mortals in the 1970s. And
this year I have met twice with Lt. Dan Choi, who served
in Iraq and then, like Leonard and Harvey, had the courage to come
home and speak out about who he is.
I spoke with a sailor who was a
ship's barber, a nuclear submarine skipper, a Navy
psychiatrist, a Navy journalist, an Army intelligence
officer, the first Marine injured in the current war in
Iraq, a drill sergeant, a half dozen WWII veterans,
Korean War veterans, Vietnam War veterans, Iraq combat
veterans, an admiral, two generals,
Airmen, Sailors, Soldiers, Marines, Guardsmen and Coasties, recruits, sergeants, petty officers, a warrant
officer, lieutenants, majors, colonels, linguists,
cooks, cryptographers, weapons experts, mechanics,
gunners, chaplains, Black veterans, White veterans, a
Native American veteran, Asian American veterans,
Hispanic veterans and more; all gay, lesbian, bisexual,
or transgender; all proud to have determinedly served
their country.
Every time I speak to a vet,
humbled to be one among them, I am in awe as they tell
me their stories. I have a question that I ask
nearly every one, "When you volunteered, you knew
who you were (gay, lesbian, bi, and or transgender); WHAT
were you thinking!?" Not one hesitated; to a man or
woman, each said, "I wanted to serve my country."
What kind of people are we,
who have chosen to be warriors? Imagine having the nerve to ask an
heroic Tuskegee Airman where he got the idea that he
could be a war pilot. Only a fool would ask such
questions. There are a few people among us in our
nation who have the courage to step forward to serve;
being gay or straight, black or white, makes no
difference at all. And yet, members of minorities
who volunteer must have a stronger commitment and vision
to see beyond the discrimination they endure in order to
serve the cause of freedom.
Proponents of DADT repeal
speak about fairness and readiness; but gay
service members and veterans talk about patriotism.
Opponents obsess about advances and eyeballs. But
our young men and women are not going through training
and going to Iraq to love; just like their straight
counterparts, those they love are back home worried sick
day and night for their entire deployment. No one
signs away his life to put himself in harm's way
where he can get his legs blown off or brains bashed in
just so he can sneak a look at some buddy's behind
in a shower. Our men and women train by crawling
through mud and barbed wire with live ammunition flying
over their heads, learn the technology of war and the
enforcement of peace, rise before dawn, run miles, eat
lousy food, give up their security and peaceful lives
and love because they want to be a part of something
greater than themselves; they want to serve in the
world's premier force for freedom.
Those who served in Vietnam and
before told me that they "served in silence." Some
joined even before they realized who they were,
particularly during WWII, eager to do their duty along
with all other Americans. Until recently, the most
common experience has been to serve in silence for two
years, four years, ten and twenty years or, in the case
of flag officers I've spoken with, for more than thirty
years. Imagine the loneliness of sacrificing ever
finding someone to love for all that time!
Several
years ago, a retired general spoke to a group of LGBT
vets gathered in Washington DC. This man, with a
chest full of medals, who had commanded and been
responsible for thousands of troops, their security and
that of our nation, wept when he described the sacrifice
of love for over three decades of the best years of his
life. I thought my heart would burst, hearing his
story. And this past month, I spoke with a 71 year
old transgender woman who had served for 37 years
including service as a Sea Bee Purple Heart combatant in
Vietnam. Where does such courage and commitment come from!?
I will never run out of veterans
to talk with, nor stories to tell. There are over
a million of us LGBT veterans, each with a story to tell of quiet
personal sacrifice; who, along with 26 million American
veterans living today, served our nation.
This past weekend, along with
millions of other Americans, I watched the funeral
proceedings of a man who had spent a lifetime of
personal pain and loss while never wavering in his
commitment to his nation's ideals. He lost his
eldest brother in battle in WWII and his next two
brothers to assassinations, and on through his life
suffered seeing illness and injury befall those he
loved. When he suffered setbacks due to personal
failings as a young man, he joined the US Army and
served two honorable years as a Private First Class in
order to reorient his goals and aspirations. He
went on to serve us as a member of congress for nearly
50 years. Senator Kennedy was
committed to seeing to it that all Americans share the
same rights.
In his eulogy to Senator Kennedy,
President Obama said in part,"Through his own
suffering, Ted Kennedy became more alive to the plight
and suffering of others — the sick child who could not
see a doctor; the young soldier sent to battle without
armor; the citizen denied her rights because of what she
looks like or who she loves or where she comes from."
(nytimes.com, Aug. 29, 2009)
This coming autumn, following Senate
hearings on DADT, Senator Kennedy had planned to introduce the Senate bill to
repeal the Don't Ask Don't Tell policy so that, at last,
all patriotic Americans could choose to serve their
country openly in Pride regardless of whom they happen
to love. Who will have the courage and force of
commitment to lift that torch and carry on with his
goal? One million patriotic LGBT vets, seventy
thousand on active duty, and
thousands of young Americans with the courage to step
forward and serve their country, await.
-------------------------------------------
On October 10th,
2009, at 2 PM, Dr. Frank Kameny and LT Dan Choi, along
with other gay veterans, will speak at a memorial
service at the grave of Leonard Matlovich at the
Congressional Cemetery in Washington D.C.
© 2009
Gay Military Signal |
